Too crazy for the Christians.....

Too Christian for the crazies...

What a flippin conundrum.

Do you really know what The Grace Of God is?

Do you understand that being in a personal relationship with Yahovey, aka God, is NOT a religion?

Do you think you have to dress a certain way in order to be "one of us"?

Do you follow the Word of God or the "party line"?

It's strange to be free in Messiah. I mean, he took me from my delusional ambition to be a millionaire, complete with short hair and kakhi shorts, too being a long haired big bearded "pioneer of the land".

Before moving out here to TMON, (my new acronym for The Middle Of Nowhere), I was becoming thee stereo-typical Bible totin Jesus lovin jerk. I thought I knew all there was to know about it. I went to the Christian restaurants. I was surrounded by Christians, nary a heathen among em. I "did church" Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night and Bible studies on Thursday nights. My "Home group" met on Tuesday nights and Saturday morning was the men's prayer breakfast.

To those of the "street crowd" variety, I was a target for hate and derision. Street evangelism wasn't even on my screen. I knew that I had come from the bottom and wanted to stay as far away from it as possible.

I was, in short, a jerk. A very clean cut jerk.

But then God.....

I really was sincere in my desire to get to know the Lord better. I had been hearing lots about Him and all, but it just wasn't there, ya know? I had decided that once the ship came in, I was going to Bible College, to find out what the Book really said.

Well, it's amazing just how fast a house of cards can come tumbling down. My dreams of financial security went "poof", just like that. The goose that was laying Golden Eggs left the country, taking many folks investment funds with him. I heard he's living like a king in Manilla, but frankly, who cares.

"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." It's NOT the other way around if you're serious about getting to know the big guy! He will not take a back seat! As a matter of fact, He really hates that "God is my co-pilot" bumper sticker! He's the freekin PILOT, let Him fly the thing!

Ok, so enough about that.

There I was, suddenly on the street. When you have a $5000 per month nut to crack and no income, the trip to the sidewalk is swift. That's when I found myself totally having to rely on God, for real, no faking it this time. I found myself living in my pup tent on the back forty of the land I'm still on now. I had a Bible, a sleeping bag and all of my stuff that I could fit into 30 gallon barrels. It was kind of like going camping only there was no return date. I had a few dollars but that was used up pretty quickly and I had no choice but to trust God to provide. On the side of a mountain. In the woods. 25 kms from the nearest town. With winter fast approaching.

Funny thing about hair, it just keeps coming out of my face and scalp. I have some strong genes or something because it grows incredibly fast and thick. I was also thrown into "fellowship" with some "unconventional" folks. Christians, sort of. Smoking tobacco and "the other stuff" was commonplace. As a matter of fact, I held out for six months before succumbing to the temptation. Yep, I said temptation... But the amazing thing was, God was providing for me. I never once went without a meal that I needed. I always had a warm dry place to sleep. I was spending hours every day reading and studying Gods Word, with signs and wonders following. Not to mention the tests! One such test was getting a little thing called Osteo Osteoma. Basically, it was a tumor growing just above my right knee, on the bone. It hurt, alot. I like to think of myself as tough, not much can make me knuckle under and give up, but this thing was something else. I prayed like crazy for it to be removed but it just got worse. I knew God was there, His provision for all the basics was always covered, but for reasons only He knew, He let that dang tumor get the best of me!

It's a long walk to town on two good legs, try it on one that hurts so bad that you have to tie a tourniquet around it to numb it enough to walk, for 25 km's. Then having to hitch-hike another 150 or so miles to where I might be able to find a doctor to look at this thing.

I made it by the grace of God, and ended up at an old couples house, folks I knew from my previous life, and they let me sleep in their spare room and made an appointment for me to see their doctor the next day. Did I mention that the hair was exploding from my head? And that working really hard without running water can leave one a little ripe? My jeans were held together with duct tape, I had a big old leather hat on, a scarf tied around my leg, and a black leather jacket. Buddy, I wouldn't have picked me up!

The experience at the doctor was a real wake up though. I guess I didn't look like a "christian" anymore, even though I had never been so alive in all of my life. Long story short, he figured I was just trying to get free drugs off of him and basically showed me out of his office.

It was a few days later that the Lord led me to another doctor, this one actually believed me. He ordered some x-rays so I had to hang around town for a few days. While I was there, the Lord led me downtown. Step drag, step drag, step drag, all while looking like a total freak. It was great! The street folks accepted me right away, after all, I was "one of them". At least on the outside anyway. You've heard of wolves in sheep's clothing? I was a sheep in wolves clothing, haha. I could get right in tight with someone, bum a smoke or give them a light, whatever, then BOOM! Do you know Jesus? Ha ha ha, man they either ran or dropped to their knees right there. Ok, some wanted to fight but there is power in the name above all names and guess what? It works! I have seen demons flee, the devil cower and souls saved. All because I had spent a little time with God and was "walkin the walk, not just talkin the talk".

Then it happened, I bumped into a brother I knew from church. Of course I recognized him right away, he hadn't changed a bit, but he had to focus real hard to recognize me. And when he finally realized it was me under all of that hair and stuff, he was suddenly very awkward. He didn't know what to say. All I could do was tell him about how cool it was to be so intimate with God and how He was using me and blessing me in ways I never could have dreamed of. I was excited about my new relationship with Jesus and wanted to tell him how he could have a deeper more exciting relationship with Him too, all he ha to do was "let go an let God". For some reason, he didn't seem too thrilled. He said nice to see you again and couldn't get away from me fast enough. I felt so sorry for him. Unfortunately, this has been a bit of a pattern for me. There are a few of my old brothers and sisters who don't judge me based on my appearance, and God bless them. But there are a few who want nothing to do with me now. I'm a "backslider" you see.

Well then there's the other side of the coin. I know lots of people now who are not only not believers, they are either into "alternative modalities" or are just plain atheists. They see me coming and then cringe because I'm a "Jesus freak". Not all mind you, but most of them.

It comes with the territory. When Yeshua lives inside of you, the folks you come in contact with will react to you the same way they would react to Him, love Him or hate Him. This little thing called conviction comes upon them and they get really uncomfortable around you but they don't know why. I had one guy tell me he really liked me but that he couldn't stand to be around me too long. When I tried to explain that it wasn't me he was having a problem with but Jesus in me, he flatly refused to believe it, confirming for me that he was indeed under conviction of sin. Oh well. Lord, there's another one, bless him and bring him home.

So that's my blog for today. If anyone is actually reading these things, forgive me for being so sporadic in my posts. This thing called life keeps happening and it keeps taking all of my time.

May God bless you and keep you,

Peace out, boom shaka laka.....